My Drug of Choice: Love

By Katanna Tatz
By Katanna Tatz

I got more work done on my cosmic ascension butterflies tattoo the other day (Butterflies with motherf***** stars in them, Yo!)

While I’m so happy to be putting this symbolic art on my body because it’s thrilling, exciting and awesome,  it’s also kinda painful. That’s the beauty of tattoos. They, like so many other of the good things in life (the things worth doing) require some pain before you get to the beauty.

You have to suffer for this particular art, at least, a little bit.

It actually didn’t hurt as much as the first session, where one of the butterflies on my shoulder blade was right over a nerve bundle that made my leg spasm.

This was still a little unpleasant though, as repeatedly scrapping your skin with needles to inject ink tends to be. I wanted to be present for the process, rather than checked out, which was really my only option since I don’t happen to have any crazy painkillers (although if you happen to want to share, I can give you my mailing address).

Anyway, as I love to experiment (and had little else to do), I played with several different kinds of meditation and mental games to play with the pain.

I tried various relaxation, self hypnosis and breathing techniques which definitely helped, I did some Reiki on myself, which seemed difficult, and I also let my mind wander, which was the most enjoyable when I relaxed enough to really dive into my imagination. I wound up flying around in the field of stars that was being tattoo’d on me, but that only worked for a little while (it was fun while it lasted though)

My cosmic flight came to an end and I came back into my body when I needed to shift positions and stretch. I couldn’t quite get back there, and was wondering where else to visit  when a mental picture of a friend randomly popped into my head.  I spontaneously sent that person all my love both from my heart and  from a cosmic source that’s easily tapped into. I saw them covered in these brilliant wavy cartoon like lines and triangles of light, and could tell they were just soaking it up.

Another friend popped into my mind and I sent them all my love as well, seeing it, and feeling it deeply. I noticed then that the pain had faded way into the background, as things are wont to do when you are no longer focusing on them.

So, I kept at it for quite some time, sending love and light to my family, my friends, different places and finally the whole world. As I was absorbed in my love, I barely felt the tattoo.. What I did feel was warm fuzzies, all over, like being cocooned in a love blanket.

I’m sure distracting myself in any way would help with pain, but sending love was more than just a distraction. It gave me something constructive to do, something to focus on. We all talk about love and light a lot. So much so, that I think it’s easy to forget their awesome power. I’m super grateful for this experience reminding me again, that they are the best drugs. As the master philosopher’s in The Beatles sang: Love is all you need. Unless you have access to good pharmaceuticals. They would probably help too.

3 thoughts on “My Drug of Choice: Love

  1. That’s a very cool looking tattoo – I too can’t wait to see the finished result. I was tattooed for four hours over the weekend, and some of that was intensely painful {sensitive underside of the arm}. I have a different take from you on the pain. I like to be fully present for it. Some times the tattooist and I chatted for a bit, but most of the time I relaxed into the pain and the other bodily sensations I was feeling, and that made it all so much better. I love the idea of going through the pain to get to the beauty!

    1. Thanks Anne-Marie. I took your advice for my most recent session, and as I leaned into the pain, I was taken out of my body into a very interesting visionary experience. It amazing! Love your blog by the way 🙂

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