Monthly Archives: January 2013

The Joyful Movement Movement

In this Ted x talk, Theresa Rose exemplified what this blog and my life are all about. In 14 minutes she distills the very essence of how life changing and enriching joyful movement can be. She also hoops through the whole thing, as she explains how the hoop revolution is part of the joyful movement movement where a growing number of us are finding peace and happiness through playful movement. Not hard core exercise, but allowing our bodies to move freely and have fun in any way that brings us joy.

The happiest moments in my life have always been when I am joyfully moving. Skiing, tobogganing, running around and being silly, rolling down a hill, dancing under the stars at a festival, or just dancing where ever I am with my hoop. This joyful movement brings so many physical, mental and spiritual benefits it’s mind blowing. Since introducing more moments like this in my life by sustaining a hoop practice, my entire life has gotten better in innumerable ways, just like Theresa’s. I have more energy because I am physically active. I have more patience because I have that physical release and I have more joy because joy begets joy. I move joyfully every day, and that joy resonates so deep within my soul that it changes me. It makes me better, and inspires me to make the world a better place. My mission in life is to share this joyful movement with others through dancing, teaching, performing and writing.

Theresa calls joyful movement a cosmic alarm clock, waking us up to our own divinity. When we find flow in our movement, we are fully inhabiting the present moment with our bodies, minds and spirits in complete unison. She also says “In this spiraling, sacred container, we realize we are enough.” This realization is how we  awakening to our divinity, to our connection to everything. When we feel we are enough- that we are good enough, that we have enough, that this moment is enough- we find peace and joy. When I dance, I am enough… I am complete, and I live in joy.

Cocooned

Alice Popkorn-CC by2.0
Alice Popkorn-CC by2.0

I feel cocooned today.

Actually, I’ve kind of felt like I’ve been in a cocoon since the start of this year.

I don’t want to go out.

I’ve spent days inside my house, relishing every moment of peace.

It was a busy December, and I made it through without my usual dramatic break down or bah humbug moments. I was completely aware of the crazy cosmic energy that was being sent our way, and I could feel it in my soul and in my bones. The insane work schedule was easier to take this year, AND I would up with more money. All in all, I did very well keeping it together.

Now I feel like staying in, having quiet  days and even quieter nights. I’ve been productive though. I’ve been  working on some creative projects, putting together some dance workshops, working on choreography, listening to and collecting music, organizing and cleaning the house, starting this blog and watching a ton of Netflicks.

I’m happy to be at home, hibernating.

There are so many things I could be out doing, even tonight. Dance events, friends spinning at clubs, flow sessions… None of them have the same appeal as my cozy cocoon. Actually, as I contemplated making my way out into the cold to do something tonight, my body said Please stay in! Please?

That settled it, of course. I need to stay in right now. I feel like it’s important to be still, and to be by myself… I feel like there is a crystallization happening within me. There have been a lot of energetic shifts over the last few months. Great leaps forward! Humanity is resonating at higher frequencies, and it’s beautiful. It’s also been a little draining. It’s going to take a little while for my body to catch up and feel harmonized with all that is. I’m going to enjoy the time off and dream of this spring and summer when things will take off again.

For now, I’m just gonna enjoy looking out my window, and looking inward to see what’s coming up next!

Being a Stinker (And Other Lessons in Listening)

So…. I used to have a pretty awkward problem.

I was stinky.

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Seriously, I was incredibly flatulent. In a very gross way. It was often hilarious, but also highly inconvenient and all kinds of awful.

It really came to a head when I became a vegetarian about 10 years ago. It was so bad, I started taking digestive enzymes to help with it. I had started eating quite a bit more fiber and beans. Took my body awhile to get used to it, but it never really went away. Ask any of my ex’s or my old roommates, it was pretty excessive.

I didn’t think that it was indicative of some kind of issue though. I thought I was just a stinky gal and that was that. It wasn’t until my sister told me she was having issues with wheat/gluten that it even crossed my radar. I started paying attention to when I was stinky (which was most of the time,  making it hard to nail down), but eventually I noticed a correlation between eating things like pizza and pasta or drinking beer with being stinky later. I started trying to eat less bread and such for a while, but that was hard, especially as a vegetarian. I didn’t really change my diet at all. At least, not right away.

A year or two later  I noticed I was getting hives on the inside of my forearms. I thought it might be my laundry detergent, or bed bugs again (I had bed bugs once and had “hives” all over my body and spent a week trying to figure out what I was allergic to before waking up to one crawling on my face. Horrifying). Eventually, I started noticing  they would appear about 12 hours after I ate wheat. It took me awhile to notice/admit it to myself. It took even longer before I really made an effort to take it out of my diet.

I would eat gluten-free for a while and then I would cheat. It would go OK, so I would cheat a little more, and then more. All of a sudden, it would hit me and not only would I get stinky as all hell, and hivey (if that is a word) but other, less pleasant gastrointestinal symptoms popped up. I also became incredibly emotional. It was weird. I would get sad and mad and be basically kind of crazy for no apparent reason. I suspect my emotional instability has to do with the fact that it was making me sick in many ways and I just didn”t feel good. I get kind of crazy like this when I am coming down with the flu as well. I am not a good patient. I’m actually a huge baby when I’m sick. Good thing it’s not very often.

Anyway, I went through this cycle of eating gluten-free, then falling off the wagon over and over again, many, many times. It was during this time I started eating meat again (I always said I would be vegetarian as long as I remained happy and healthy without meat, but it seemed overwhelming to be both meat and gluten-free).  Every time I fell off the wagon and landed on a gooey delicious pizza, I felt worse  and worse.  It’s really only this last year that I’ve been very careful with it, but I still occasionally ate free chocolate cake at work whenever it came available. I was just aware of the sacrifice I would be making (it always seemed worth it at the time).

I had food poisoning on Dec 21,2012. I performed at a super rad Christmas party, stayed for dinner and had to leave around 9 and barely made it home in time. I was 4 1/2 pounds lighter in the morning. I had eaten a questionable piece of fish (I had noted it as a likely food poisoning culprit when I swallowed the rancid bite).  The next few days I ate very sparingly, and was super careful of what I put into my body. I questioned how everything was going to make me feel before I ate it. Any time I tried something that I wasn’t really sure about, sure enough, it hurt my stomach. I started realizing that my body had the answers, and every time I tried to overrule with my brain, it ended badly, with pain.

I felt so good when I listened to what my body really wanted to eat that I decided to just keep going with it. I wanted to explore more deeply and uncover whatever other pieces of wisdom I might find within this bag of flesh. I also started spontaneously loving my body more. Feeling good begets feeling good I guess.

Somewhere along the way, I realized I hadn’t had a drink in a few weeks. Whenever anyone offered me one I declined, remembering the awful sour taste of the wine I had drunk on the 21st as it came back up. I started to relish in my new-found clarity, and realized that the relaxing effect of even a glass of wine made me far less in touch with my body as well as far less productive. I realized my body never really wanted the alcohol. Sure, I love the taste of wine. I have my first Sommelier certification and truly enjoy all the wine babble, but as good as a glass made me feel, it didn’t make me feel good for long. I get sleepy and apathetic after the glass wears off, and if I keep drinking that’s a whole ‘nother set of issues that come up right there.

So, when I realized I wanted to pursue this radical self love project where I listen to whatever my body says, I realized it means staying stone cold sober. For the first time in my life, the idea was thrilling. I’m excited to see how much more productive I will be. In case anyone was interested,  I also no longer stink it up on a regular basis (but being human, I still have the odd moment.)

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The Wisdom Inside

By Cristina L.F - CC by 2.0
By Cristina L.F – CC by 2.0

Everything in the universe exists inside us.

We are bits of the universe experiencing ourselves.  I know, it’s pretty meta, but it’s true.

“The cosmos is within us. We are made of star-stuff. We are a way for the universe to know itself.”  Said esteemed scientist Carl Sagan.

All the knowledge, wisdom and power is hidden within us. We have hidden it from ourselves so we can have this human experience and learn what it is like to be limited. But our limits are illusory and self inflicted.

We’re now at the point in our spiritual evolution that we can reclaim our divine heritage, as beings made from the same source energy as all of creation. We are limitless…

“All power is within you; you can do anything and everything. Believe in that, do not believe that you are weak; do not believe that you are half-crazy lunatics, as most of us do nowadays. You can do any thing and everything, without even the guidance of any one. Stand up and express the divinity within you.” -Swami Vivikananda

Over and over this message has been leaking it’s way into our culture, from Eastern Religions, Hollywood movies and science.
It won’t be long until it becomes accepted by the masses.

We’re on our way to knowing ourselves as the powerful, and eternal beings that we really are. The tough part is to get over the brainwashing we’ve had since birth, that we are limited beings. We’ve been ruled by our egos and through fear.

Once we start to connect deeply with the wisdom carried within us we will start to unlock our power. The knowledge is within our hearts, within our cells and within our spirits.

It’s happening globally at level of human consciousness, but this also happens on an individual level.

Take some time to sit quietly, where you will be undisturbed. Breathe deeply and let yourself relax. Clear your mind and ask your heart…. Are you more powerful than you would like to admit? Could you perhaps be more than who you appear to be? A being of light? A piece of the universal energy who has come into this form to experience this life to learn, grow, and explore ?

Your heart will tell you YES! If you don’t often listen to your body- to your heart, it may be faint at first but something deep within you will resonate with this message. You are more than a mere human being. So much more! Fear might have held you back from exploring this, but there is no need to be afraid anymore.  You are stronger and more powerful than you ever dreamed of. We aren’t capable of even conceptualizing the power that resides within our spirit.

I know this body isn’t my whole identity. I am residing in it, a visitor who has come for the experience. I wanted to be here, to learn and be within this physical form. I made the choice to live in this body for the duration of this trip to Earth because I wanted to learn from being in this body.

I am choosing to work with my body consciously, so I can unearth whatever wisdom it can share with me about being within in, on this physical plane. If we’re stuck together, might as well make the best of it. Right body? Absolutely! We have a lot to talk about!

Alice Popkorn- CC by 3.0
Alice Popkorn- CC by 3.0

Polite Conversations

I have started a dialogue with my body.

We have full conversations. Now that I’m good enough and willing to listen, it has a lot to say.

For the last few day’s, I’ve been checking in right when I wake up.

Brain: Good morning!

Body: Hmmm, ‘morning. Stretch me!

I stretch and yawn as I lie there, slowly rebooting myself, getting ready for the day.

Brain: I love you!

I realize I’m hugging myself gently, and it feels nice.

Body: Mmmm, I love cuddles.

I roll over and give my husband a good morning hug too. Might as well share the love.

It’s a nice way to wake up.

Once I’m out of bed, I ask my body “Want some  breakfast right away, or just tea for the moment?”

Today all I wanted was tea for the first hour I was awake. The last few days I was ravenous the instant I was awake.

I’ve been checking in on what to eat too.  “What would you like for breakfast?”

Some granola, coconut milk and a hard-boiled egg.

That was different and unexpected. I’ve had an over medium egg with a slice of gluten-free bread spread with natural peanut butter and some blackberry jam every morning for months. I guess my body is sick of the routine.  It was pretty tasty.

We’ve been having multiple conversations like this a day, every time I go to eat something. It’s been illuminating. I think I’m making better choices because I know I’ll be running them past my body first, but my body did surprise me. Yesterday afternoon I had eaten a couple Udi’s gluten-free chocolate chip cookies. Then later, I wanted more, so I asked how that would feel, expecting a No way, Jose! response, but I got a have ‘atter! instead.  After dinner, I had this unceasing desire for the last 2 cookies. Again, I was expecting a negative when I asked my body how it felt about that, but the reply came That’s fine if you eat some protein with it as well. I mean, it’s not ideal, but it’s not gonna be terrible either. Definitely won’t be a weight loss day though. Huh. Interesting. I ate the cookies along with 12 almonds. You know, I didn’t feel terrible after, but the sixth cookie wasn’t as tasty as the first 5 that day.

Laying in bed, before falling asleep I spent some time expressing love and gratitude to my body. In a dialogue, get your mind out of the gutters, hehe. But it was a lot easier to say “Body, I love you!” and mean it knowing I wasn’t gonna be denied copious amounts of cookies if I really felt the need to eat them.